


Spinner's End

by GaleTheSnail



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-03
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:34:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25687402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GaleTheSnail/pseuds/GaleTheSnail
Summary: Narcissa Malfoy and Severus Snape have been having an affair for the last ten years. During a meaningful visit to Spinner’s End, Narcissa reflects on their relationship, her feelings for Snape, and the terrible promise she must ask of him.
Relationships: Narcissa Black Malfoy/Severus Snape
Comments: 1
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place at the beginning of HBP. Slightly AU before and after that.

With a distinct pop, Narcissa appeared suddenly onto a familiar cobblestone road. She passed row after row of decrepit houses automatically swiveling her head in either direction. Despite the seemingly empty Muggle dwelling, her heightened state of paranoia was not without cause. With the growing level of power and influence the Dark Lord wielded, she did not feel it was redundant to be exceedingly cautious after Lucius’ mishap at the Ministry of Magic. While Lucius was safely tucked away in Azkaban for the moment, she had more to fear for than her own life if she was discovered during this particular journey. Deciding that she was not, in fact, being followed she quickened her footsteps down the familiar path as the cool night breeze dried her tear-stained face. Narcissa had walked this trail on countless occasions. Although, the anticipation she felt on those evenings compared nothing to her present urgency to reach her destination. Arriving at the door, her hurried knocking betrayed the desperation she felt. A small crack in the door and a sliver of curtained, black hair indicated her hopes of his presence were to be validated. 

“Narcissa?!?” said a slow, drawling voice. “I wasn’t expecting you until tomorrow evening. What a pleasant surprise!” he said as he opened the door fully. 

“Severus, I need to speak with you. It’s urgent,” Narcissa whispered desperately, on the verge of tears again. 

Upon seeing her face, Severus stood to the side silently letting her pass. He closed the door and walked towards Narcissa, his obsidian-colored robes billowing behind him. Narcissa sat on the small sofa in the middle of the sitting room before Snape could offer the invitation, She threw off the hood of her cloak as Snape sat beside her, clasping her shaking hands. The affect of his hand on hers was immediate; Narcissa felt herself relax slightly, but she still found it difficult to speak the words she had come to say. 

“Breathe slowly, Narcissa. Take your time,” Snape intoned as his thumb brushed away a falling tear from her face. 

“Severus, I’m sorry to come unannounced, but I needed to see you. I need your help.” Steely blue eyes met impassive black ones. She marveled for a moment how Snape had the ability to express emotion with everything but his eyes. Over the years, it both impressed and infuriated her. She sensed that he was waiting on her to continue before he spoke another word, but she hesitated. 

“The Dark Lord does not wish for me to speak a word of this to anyone…”

“Then you should not say anything further. The word of the Dark Lord is law,” Snape said firmly.

Narcissa looked as if he had struck her, then turned her head from him to hide her tears. She felt him stand up and face the window, peering out into the dreary night. It was several moments before he spoke again.

“The Dark Lord has let me in on the plan. Though, had he not, you would have put the two of us in a precarious position,” Snape said. 

Narcissa’s eyes were wide with hope as she stood from the couch to grasp his hand. 

“I knew you would be. He trusts you more than anyone Severus. You know what he has asked Draco to do. You must help him! Please!” Narcissa was shaking again with renewed sobs. 

“I believe the Dark Lord intends me to do it in the end,” Snape admitted quietly. 

“After Draco has died in the attempt?!?!” Narcissa questioned severely. “He doesn’t care if Draco lives or dies. This is punishment for Lucius’ mistakes!” Narcissa felt quite unhinged as she turned away to hide her tears once more. She felt his hand lightly touch her shoulder and she immediately turned to enfold herself within his arms.

“Narcissa, I would never let that happen. Of course I will protect him.”

While his eyes rarely betrayed his emotions, his words comforted her like nothing else could. 

“You will watch over Draco as he attempts to do the Dark Lord’s bidding?” she questioned.

“I will,” Snape said as he gazed into her determined face.

“You will protect him from harm?”

“To the very best of my abilities,” he said seriously.

Narcissa’s last words came out as a whisper. “Should Draco fail in his attempts, will you do the deed assigned to him by the Dark Lord?”

Snape stared into her eyes for another long moment, but she refused to blink. Finally his answer came.

“I will.”

For the first time in weeks, she felt as though there was hope. She continued to gaze into the cold, dark eyes that she had known for years as the full weight her request laid between them. Words could not express the relief and gratitude that she felt. Her heart swelled as more tears threatened to drop from her eyes.

“Severus…” she whispered softly. 

Before she could finish her sentence, he was embracing her. She put all of her gratitude and grief into their moment of passion. While she felt she would continue to worry as only mothers can, she knew she had made the right decision in coming here. 

Turning to Lucius was out of the question as he was currently in Azkaban, and even if he wasn’t, it had been a long time since Lucius treated her as his confidante. Bellatrix was nothing short of ecstatic at her nephew’s ingratiation to the Death Eaters. Andromeda, her only other family, was shunned long ago for her detestable views on the proper etiquette of a witch or wizard. No, Narcissa knew in her heart of hearts that she had come to the right place. Severus was her saving grace as he had been for so many years. Spinner’s End was the home of her oldest friend, her lover, her protector.


	2. Chapter 2

Narcissa lay awake in the middle of the night. She sat upright pushing away the stifling bedcovers that hindered the movement of her legs. With only the moonlight as her guide, she stared across the bedroom at the perfectly organized bookshelf. Copies of _Moste Potente Potions, Lizards’ Claws from Africa, The Dark Arts Outsmarted, and Wanderings with Werewolves_ were just a few of the works that lined the shelves of her sleeping companion. Narcissa allowed herself a rare smile at his expense. For a man so guarded, his passions in life were no hidden secret. She turned to look at the man sleeping beside her; he was beginning to stir and mutter in his sleep. He did this often when there was something on his mind. It was never anything coherent, but always done in agitation. Narcissa instinctively brought her hand to the top of his head, stroking the dusky strands in a calming motion. A pang of guilt and compassion washed over her, normally, haughty figure. Even as he slept, Severus could not escape the daunting thoughts that seemed to torment him regularly, and tonight she added to the worries that constantly plagued him. She continued to stroke his hair, reveling in the rare opportunity to comfort him. Only in moments like this did he allow her to protect him…when he had no conscious knowledge of her doing so. 

‘Ten years…’ Narcissa thought. Ten years she and Severus had been having an affair, but she had known him for nearly thirty years at this point. She thought to the first day she laid eyes on Severus Snape. He was a scrawny, little first year at Hogwarts walking (more confidently than she would have expected) to the Sorting Hat. She and Lucius had been bold and beautiful fifth years sitting at the Slytherin table. Ordinarily, she would not have had the time to spare for a first year with greasy hair, but Lucius seemed to have taken him under his wing. Of course she had time for whatever Lucius made time for back then. Narcissa only had eyes for Lucius; handsome, a prefect, on his way to being Headboy, popular wizard from a rich, prominent wizarding family. Everyone she knew, her family especially, expected Narcissa and Lucius to be married one day. What more could she ask for in life? 

So when the apple of her eye took notice of a scrawny, little first year, she wondered what was so special. She quickly began to understand the draw. Despite just entering Hogwarts, Severus was more skilled and knowledgeable than the vast majority of the school. He was intelligent, but not keen for the spotlight like so many of his less talented peers. Lucius, cunning as ever, could see the value in being a mentor to someone like Severus. He even invited Snape to Malfoy Manor during the summer months. She came to think of Snape as Lucius’ brooding younger brother. Narcissa used to think (for one horrific moment in time) that Severus might be a good match for her austere sister Bellatrix, but the thought was extinguished quickly when he and Bellatrix would continually try to maim and insult each other at every available moment. 

Narcissa removed her hand from Snape’s hair to stifle a small giggle threatening to escape her lips. 

“What, dare I ask, has caused the dignified Narcissa Malfoy to titter about in the middle of the night?” came a deep murmur from beside her. 

Narcissa, slightly surprised by the utterance, jumped before continuing to smile. She looked down at the pale and bleary face of Severus Snape. His hair was sticking up at odd angles and he looked uncharacteristically informal in his sleeping robes. The only effect this had was to make Narcissa giggle more loudly than before. 

“If you must know, Professor Snape, I was pondering for a moment about how I used to think you and dear Bellatrix would have made a darling pair,” Narcissa admitted with a half glance at Snape. 

“A darling pair indeed. Had she not tried to set my hair on fire so many times, I would have certainly made an honest woman of her,” Snape smiled. 

“I suppose it’s a good thing that I turned out to be so utterly wrong. Had you two gotten married, I don’t think I would be here now,” Narcissa said, her smile falling. 

“What, precisely, has brought about this surge of nostalgia?” Snape asked, a note of concern in his voice. 

“I was wondering…” Narcissa began hesitantly. 

“Go on,” Snape said encouragingly.

“I was wondering how we got here. How we came to be where we are now. When we first met, did you ever think this was the path our lives would take?” Narcissa asked, turning a strained face to Snape. 

Snape began to smirk. 

“When we first met, I thought you must be an Animagus. I’d never seen anyone who could hold their nose so high in the air while looking down on everyone else,” Snape teased lightly.

“Oh, Severus, don’t be foolish. You know precisely what I mean,” Narcissa said as her smile faltered. The reality of their circumstances and the request she made of him was weighing heavily on her mind. She wore an expression to convey her unwillingness to be sidetracked. 

“Cissa,” Snape began more seriously. “…we all knew what joining the Dark Lord would mean. The risks involved were nothing compared to the freedom he offered for us. Any regrets or misgivings are best kept to ourselves,” Snape intoned. Even in the shadows of night, Narcissa could feel Snape’s mask-like expression take over his countenance. Anger boiled inside of her cold, pale skin threatening to erupt. She threw aside her blanket covers and charged from the bed with dramatic force.

“Always the same. ‘Keep your emotions bottled up Cissa! Do not speak of your feelings Narcissa!’” she mocked, derisively. 

“You sound foolish,” Snape responded, coldly. “I would expect this behavior from the emotional ignoramuses I teach. While they prattle on about the minutiae of their boring, teenaged lives I am left admiring the dignity with which you normally comport yourself. You disappoint me this evening Narcissa,” Snape said as he too left the comfort of their shared bed. 

“The nerve to refer to my feelings as minutiae!” Narcissa said, incensed. “My son’s life is in mortal danger. My husband sits in Azkaban as we speak. My family is falling apart. When I turn to you for help, you stand there and mock me?” Narcissa exclaimed. 

“Lucius is in Azkaban because he was too incompetent to do the Dark Lord’s bidding on more than one occasion. I should think you were glad to be rid of him, and you must know that Draco can take care of himself considering the fact that you are here instead of Malfoy Manor,” Snape spat savagely. 

“How dare you!!!”

Narcissa’s fury was unhinged. She grabbed her wand and sent books flying from the bookshelf towards Snape who discarded them easily with a flick of his wrist. Narcissa slammed the bedroom door closed and began looking for her cloak in the sitting room. 

Shaking with anger, she came to a halt. Her eyes were drawn across the room where, on the mantelpiece, a mahogany-cased compass sat open displaying its gold finish interior. Narcissa recognized this as the gift she had given Severus several years into their relationship. While it did serve as an ordinary compass, she bewitched the object to always point to her own whereabouts. No matter where she was in the world, Severus would be able to find her. Narcissa stared at the engraved message she inscribed years before, “Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow. Forever. Always.” Narcissa closed her eyes and continued to take slow, deep breaths. It was as though she was standing in her own Pensieve when her thoughts wandered to the first night, she and Severus had become more than just old, school friends ten years previously.

_“Where is he Severus?” Narcissa asked point blank when she showed up on his doorstep one summer evening._

_“Narcissa? This is an unexpected surprise. Please come in,” Snape said as he let her pass through the door._

_“Where is he Severus,” she asked again coldly, as though not a moment had passed._

_“Who are you speaking of Narcissa?” Snape asked confusedly, although he seemed slightly uncomfortable._

_“You do not have to lie for him Severus. We both know that Lucius is with Madam Rosmerta at the Three Broomsticks, but I want to hear you confirm it for me.” Narcissa was alarmed at her own calm demeanor, but she had no time for games. She had to know for sure._

_“Surely this is a family matter, Cissa. I do not wish to become involved…” Snape began._

_“You are Lucius’ oldest friend, like a brother really. I understand that you wish to keep his confidences, but are you not my family also Severus? Have we not spent years and years in one another’s company? Surely I have earned more credit than this?”_

_“Narcissa, it is not a question of loyalty to you…” Snape began slowly._

_“That is precisely my question. I already know my husband to be disloyal. I have known for several years of his many conquests. When the Dark Lord fell, it put a strain upon all of us. Every time I see you, I see the pain that night caused you, even if you do not want to speak of it. While your pain manifests itself in silence, my husband has found solace in the arms of other women. When he is home, his cold indifference stains our home and the joy of our son. I no longer seek his loyalty, but now I question yours. Do you know where he is now, and how he is spending his time?”_

_Snape stood in stunned silence. Finally, after Narcissa thought he would not utter a word in response, he began to speak again._

_“Narcissa, I am sorry,” Snape said with a pained expression. “I thought to tell you was to hurt you, and I could never seek to hurt you.”_

_“Since when have I been a delicate flower, too weak to withstand the truth? Is that how you choose to see me Severus?” Narcissa demanded._

_“When I look at you, I see fearlessness unparalleled by most. You carry yourself with dignity and honor offset only by the tender love you show to your son. There are few people in this world who I respect more than you Cissa. It’s why I lo…” Snape stopped himself quickly._

_“Tell me Severus,” Narcissa pleaded._

_“It is why I could not pluck up the courage to tell you of Lucius’ deeds. The very thought that I could bring you pain…nothing could give me more displeasure. You deserve more than Lucius Malfoy has given you,” Snape said. He conjured a handkerchief and wiped the tears that finally sprang from Narcissa’s eyes. Narcissa felt him take her hand in his. She could feel his nearing proximity._

_“You are one of my dearest friends Severus,” Narcissa said as she looked up at Snape’s face. She saw sorrow and regret possess his reserved features. “Never lie to me again,” she commanded. He was much too close._

_“Never again,” Snape whispered. She could feel his breath tickle her nose. Without thinking, she leaned up to capture his lips._

A firm hand at the small of her back brought Narcissa to the present moment. 

“Cissa, please,” Snape whispered softly against her ear as he wrapped his arms around Narcissa’s waist. Narcissa was torn. A part of her wanted to twist away from her…to find her cloak and storm out of the door. Another part of her, a much larger part she feared, was relenting. Her resolve was slowly deteriorating as she melted into his embrace.

“Cissa, I am so sorry,” Snape whispered again.

She turned to face him, her hands clutching the front of his robes. He kissed the top of her head softly as she buried her face in his chest.

“I’m losing my family Severus,” she said with renewed tears. She was so sick of crying, of feeling loss and betrayal. 

“Do you know how that feels? To sit back and watch everything you love slowly slip from your grasp without being able to do anything to stop it?” she asked quietly. 

“All too well,” Snape said bitterly as he raised her chin with his finger.

“I did not come by this decision lightly Severus. To ask you to take on this mission, knowing what the consequences could be…I have been sick over this Severus…”

“I know my dear. I know.”

“These could be our last days together. In a few weeks’ time you and Draco will be off to Hogwarts. I’ll have to sit at home, wondering if my son and my lover have accomplished a task that has failed every other dark wizard in the past, or if they have been killed in the attempt.”

“Narcissa, I said I would do everything in my power to protect Draco, and I meant it wholeheartedly. It would be foolish to tell you not to worry, but can I least ask you to trust me,” Severus asked. Narcissa calmed when she saw the severe look of sincerity in his eyes.

“I trust you Severus. More than you know. I trust that you will come back to me. Please come back to me. All I have to comfort me at Malfoy Manor is Bellatrix,” Narcissa finished with a watery smile.

“Nine months alone with Bellatrix? Well that’s the true tragedy here,” Snape smiled slightly.

“You and Draco are all I have in this world, Severus. Yesterday, today, tomorrow, forever…”

“…and Always,” Snape finished for her. 

Narcissa buried her head into Snape’s chest once more. She had to breathe him in as much as she could. She would take in all she could while she could. Narcissa did not know what lay ahead for them. For the first time in her life, nothing was planned. Nothing made sense. Everything seemed thoroughly unstable. She could not control her husband being in Azkaban. She could not control her son’s ambitions to join the Dark Lord. She could not control Draco’s dangerous mission. She could not control the love of her life leaving to take up his post at Hogwarts. All she could control was being with him now. Stealing away from Malfoy Manor for a few hours here and there to be in the only place she ever felt she truly belonged…at Spinner’s End with Severus Snape. The bravest man she had ever known.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a weird little bit of saccharine that wouldn't leave me alone. I had to write it just to be rid of the idea. Thank you to anyone who read and/or reviewed.


End file.
